I want to share some key sentences.
It talks of pain being "some form of nonacceptance, some form of unconscious resistance to what is." The mind denies the NOW which is in fact the only reality that we have. The past and future are just our perception and an illusion. The memory is distorted by our own internal representations of how we absorb information from events, what was said, how we felt, what we told ourselves.
"As long as you are unable to access the power of the Now, every emotional pain that you experience leaves behind a residue of pain that lives on in you. This accumulated pain is a negative energy field that occupies your body and mind.
Once this pain-body has taken you over, you want more pain. You become a victim. Look closely and you will find that your thinking and behaviour are designed to keep the pain going.
The pain-body, which is the dark shadow cast by the ego, is actually afraid of the light of your consciousness. If you don't face it, if you don't bring the light of your consciousness into your pain, you will be forced to relive it again and again.
The pain-body is trapped life energy. It may create physical aches and pains in different parts of the body but they won't last.
An unconscious fear of losing your identity will create strong resistance to any disidentification. In other words, you would rather be in pain - be the pain-body - than take a leap into the unknown and risk losing the familiar unhappy self.
Observe the resistance within yourself. Observe the attachment to your pain. Observe the peculiar pleasure you derive from being unhappy. Observe the compulsion to talk or think about it. The resistance will cease if you make it conscious.
Another aspect of the emotional pain that is an intrinsic part of the egoic mind is a deep-seated sense of lack or incompleteness, of not being whole.
People will often enter into a compulsive pursuit of ego-gratification and things to identify with in order to fill this hole they feel within. But the hole is always there. As long as the egoic mind is running your life, you cannot truly be at ease.
By saying yes to life, we see how life suddenly starts working for us instead of against us."
These words really spoke to me in relation to the pain I have been feeling over my relationship break-up three weeks ago. It is time to release that pain, push it away for it does not serve me. I have grieved the loss enough and it is time now to spend time alone, learning to be complete in myself, not looking to a partner to complete me.
I wrote down these thoughts:
"Sometimes it is necessary to feel very alone before recognising that the only person that we need is ourselves. Others may join our party but only if they bring value to our day."
"It is in the moments of deep loneliness that we need to search inside for our best friend - ourself - and enjoy our own company."
"Think of wholeness like an orange. A protective skin outside with a bright, cheerful colour. But the skin can be pierced and reveal segments representing different areas of our life. Segments when squeezed produce a juice of tears but also a juice of vitality. The skin is the image the world sees, not necessarily what is living inside."
Eckhart Tolle - The Power of Now (amazon.co.uk)
Eckhart Tolle - The Power of Now (amazon.com)
©Antonia Harrison 2009 from Personal Development in the 21st Century . Antonia Harrison is the English Hypnotherapist & NLP Coach in Belgium and Personal Development speaker giving workshops to groups and companies.