Sunday 26 April 2009

Technical Support for Installing a Husband

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
* Romance 9.5
* Personal Attention 6.5
and then installed undesirable programs such as
* NHL 5.0,
* NFL 3.0 and
* Golf Clubs 4.1
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2. 6 simply crashes the system.
* Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate.

DEAR DESPERATE ,

First, keep in mind,
* Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package while
* Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install theGuilt 3.0 update.
* If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5 ,Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
* Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, D0 NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend:
* Cooking 3.0
* Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck Desperate
Tech Support

Saturday 25 April 2009

Can You Read This?

I CAN READ IT! CAN YOU ????

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too.
Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe can.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The
phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde
Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the
olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit
pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a
pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by
istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot
slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad it.

ONLY FORWARD IF YOU CAN READ THIS

Tuesday 21 April 2009

Great Deals on Kids DVDs

Amazon are offering up to 70% discount on some great kids' DVDs right now, including some which my son wants for his birthday in May, so that is good news for me.

Great DVD titles like:





They are also offering Disney DVDs
with Buy One Get One Free.

Also Best Selling Kids DVDs such as Wall-E.

I always find that Amazon.co.uk offer a wide selection at the best prices. They ship anywhere at very reasonable rates. Most orders sent within the UK are postage free.

Monday 13 April 2009

Interesting facts of life From The Easter Bunny

Don’t put all of your eggs in one basket.
Walk softly and carry a big carrot.
Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.
All work and no play can make you a basket case.
A cute little tail attracts a lot of attention.
Good things come in small sugar-coated packages.
The grass is not necessarily greener in someone else’s basket.
To show your true colors, you’ll have to come out of your shell.
Let happy thoughts multiply like rabbits.

Wednesday 8 April 2009

Locate Your Child's Mobile Phone Anywhere in the UK

ChildLocate enables parents to locate their children's mobile phones anywhere in the UK for only £1.35 per week.

ChildLocate is the leading UK provider of mobile location services and has been featured on ITV, BBC, The Telegraph and FT to name a few. With thousands of new subscribers, ChildLocate is a must have service with millions of parents throughout the UK. ChildLocate works with mobiles on Vodafone, o2, T-Mobile, Orange, easyMobile, Fresh, BT Mobile, Tesco Mobile and Virgin Mobile.



Service Includes:
- Locate from Web
- Locate from your own mobile phone via text

Other features:
Find Me - your child can request you to be notified about it's location by sending "Find Me" text to 60066.
Text Messenger - You can send and receive text messages from the ChildLocate console.
Check In - your child can "check in" by text when arriving at a certain location and
you are notified about your childs location by email and text.

They currently offer all customers a Free 30 Day Trial!

Visit the ChildLocate website today for your Free 30 Day Trial.